What does the Red Pill mean to me?

Bear with me for a second here please, because I’m about to do something that Feminists do all the time. And quote a dictionary posting about Red Pill the same way that Feminists use the dictionary to refer to Feminism. There are four definitions there, but this is the one that applies best to me

“This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill: the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill: you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.” – Morpheus, The Matrix

‘Red pill’ has become a popular phrase among cyberculture and signifies a free-thinking attitude, and a waking up from a “normal” life of sloth and ignorance. Red pills prefer the truth, no matter how gritty and painful it may be.

“I took the red pill.”


My awakening wasn’t just around Feminism it was also around the bigger picture. Namely the government, environment, economy, etc. It DOES NOT mean that the misogyny fairy came down and gave a smack on the head and turned me into a woman hater. It also doesn’t mean that I suddenly started buying into and believing every single conspiracy theory that comes down the pipe. Nor does it mean I share the same opinion with every single other Red Pill person out there. I’ve taken it from both sides here, some have accused me of not being Red Pill enough, others see the title of my blog and simply stop reading right there.

So let me make this simple for you! My version of the Red Pill awakening isn’t going to be the same as everyone else’s. Nor was any other person that has taken the Red Pill had the same realization of everyone else.

My first real awakening came when I did my three changes for the Sterling Institute of Relationship weekend. It was a shocker, and I got mad about how badly I’d been deceived. There had been some other things that had set the foundation for me though. For instance, if you want to learn about how propaganda works “Manufacturing Consent” by Noam Chomsky is an absolute must read. Got a problem with his political leanings that’s your problem, not mine.

Manufacturing Consent

Understanding how propaganda models work and how we’re influenced by them, and by the people around me, THAT was my Red Pill Moment.

Feminism wasn’t even in the picture when this happened to me. The process that made me an MRA/MGTOW wasn’t one big event that caused me to see the light. I read this book did the Sterling Weekend and simply let events play themselves out around me as confirmation. Part of that confirmation was men in the Sterling Fellowship pointing a few things out to me. Specifically about how much Misandry is in the Feminist movement. It wasn’t the open man haters that convinced me. Those women are easy to find, and in an odd way they’re a relief to deal with. You know where you stand with them and how they’ll react to you. No, it wasn’t the open misandrists that changed my mind, it was the orbiters!

Who are these women? These are women that hate men as much if not more than the open Misandrists in the feminist movement. But because of circumstance or mentality either can’t admit or won’t admit nor even come to the realization that they hate men. This group is as large if not larger than the group of open Misandrists in Feminism based on my personal experience. And while they’re not the majority they represent a large enough percentage of Feminism to dictate the direction of Feminism. And it’s also this group and not the open Misandrists that will likely be the eventual downfall of feminism.

The process of taking the Red Pill for me is similar to that a person has to deal with via grieving. This is broken down into five steps; they are

1. Denial

This hit HARD for me! It came a couple of months after a breakup where I hadn’t moved past the anger stage. It was the realization that even a little kid I’d been programmed from day one to be separated from my maleness. The very women that raised me had taught me to be afraid of my own maleness. There had been glimmers that had shone in from time to time. But when the light got turned on and I saw what had happened? Let’s just say I moved on to step 2 pretty fast! Although in my case, my reaction was more similar to the ‘Construct’ scene from the Matrix, as opposed to the actual taking of the red pill.

Other men don’t move past this as quickly as I did. Getting this revealed to you is a major shakeup to a person’s belief system.

In our case though once taken the pill cannot be untaken. It also makes spotting fakes and imposters very easy. You either know this about yourself and the world or you don’t, it’s very hard to fake an experience like this. It does lead to step 2 eventually.

2. Anger

Oh yeah, I spent a while here! I was already angry as fuck over a breakup I had. This anger had burned away a piece of mental and emotional programming. I no longer had the capacity to bury or deny the situation in my mind. This situation extended well beyond just relationships, it was about my life in general. Where I was going, what I had done, what I was going to do if I stayed on this path I was on. Which, to be honest, was going to nowhere but mediocrity and going there fast! There had to be more? I was seeing others doing more and why couldn’t I do the same. This was frustration on top of disappointment, and I was taking it out on anyone and everyone around me. I had to leave the town I was living in at the time because if I stayed someone was going to get hurt, or I was going to get hurt. I needed a new start, and I got one. I got the space and time to process my anger and to start looking for solutions. At this time of my life though I was a very frightening and scary person.

Anger is a very strong emotion, it means that something has violated you physically, mentally or emotionally, and you need to do something about it. It’s also an emotion that when dealt with properly, burns out quickly. And it does need to be dealt with. Unfortunately, some people never get past this step.

3. Bargaining

As much as there was in my life I hadn’t done. I had still managed to do a few things right. I had kept a clean criminal record despite putting myself in some very toxic places and associating with some very toxic people. I had also managed to remain clean and sober through it all too. There had also been some pretty decent moments and happy phases as well. These though were just moments or periods and to become the person I needed to be. I had to confront the remaining demons from my childhood, to realize that I still had more than a little growing up to do. I missed the easy simplicity of what I had before on occasion, mostly because it was all so easy to live there and stay there. Is it any wonder that Cypher wanted back in without the memories?

There are some out there that look at their ‘before time’ with a bit of nostalgia. Oddly enough this a period when many addicts in treatment will go back out. Convincing themselves that it wasn’t that bad only to return and have it get much worse, because this time they know.

4. Depression

I also moved through this part pretty quickly. Yes, I was sorry about what I bought into. I wanted just to be left alone for a while. The people that were around me didn’t allow me to linger in this space for long. They pointed out to me that I was still pretty young (I had just turned 30 at this time) I had more than enough time to turn things around. I was more shocked and dismayed at my ignorance and naivete than anything else. I did as much face-palming around the red pill as when I first got off drugs. In fact had I not already gone through a similar experience via the 12 Step Program I likely wouldn’t have made it through this phase.

It’s easy for a person to feel sorry for themselves here. We’ve been duped, misled, lied to, deceived.In my case it was the people that had also saved me from addiction to boot. We bought into the society around us hook, line and sinker. For most of us it wasn’t even a choice, we were not aware that the option out there even existed. I was for instance MGTOW long before the term even existed I had gone that path without even knowing it was a path! I often wonder how many more like me are out there?

5  Acceptance

I came to the realization that this was what the reality was. I wasn’t perfect, but I’d also made more smart choices than I gave myself credit for. I would term this as the fully awake phase. I became aware of the social dynamics around and began slowly but surely to apply this awareness to the situations and people around me. This process is ongoing and is also a very personal one and for each man on his path this path is going to be different. Not only that but each man that’s taken the Red Pill is at a different stage in their personal journey at all. And every single one of us has a different version of what taking the red pill means to them. NOBODY can define beyond themselves and a very simple definition above what the Red Pill is.

I’m awake, I know, and I’m free to walk my own path and form my opinions. Beyond that well you’ll have to judge for yourself.

So if you’re one of those people that just sees the title of my blog and doesn’t read the blog? Why did you comment then? I can’t and won’t answer for any other person calling themselves a red piller because quite frankly it’s none of my business. If you want to project that other person’s failings on to me though? That’s your problem, not mine.

Please keep this in mind when you see Red Pill next time.


2 thoughts on “What does the Red Pill mean to me?

  1. Benzies

    Well written, comforting to find a different yet similar experience showing there’s more than one way of getting by for us red pillers. Thank you 🙂


  2. Pingback: Would you go back to the plantation?…Because life does happen | Red Pill Nation

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s